Osama bin Laden and Death

Last night at home group, we listened to Piper teach about living and dying to the glory of God. Then immediately after returning home, I learned of Osama bin Laden's death. My gut reaction was one of happiness and joy, maybe even celebration--probably similar to what most Americans felt. I almost broke out in spontaneous song: "Ding, Dong, the Wicked Witch is Dead..." But resisted.

However upon greater reflection, it occured to me that God was probably not rejoicing. In fact, we are told exactly how God feels about "the death of the wicked":

"As I live, declares the Lord God, I have no pleasure in the death of the wicked, but that the wicked turn from his way and live." Ezekiel 33:11

Of course, this is consistent with who God is. We all feel that Osama bin Laden got what was coming to him, he deserved to die; he did, after all, plan and fund the deaths of thousands of Americans. He did instigate a war that has cost this country billions in dollars and hundreds of lives. If he didn't deserve to die, who does? Osama died and went to hell (Yes, Rob Bell, he went to hell.) where he will suffer for eternity. And he deserved it. But so do I. So do you.

And the fact that bin Laden's life was one spent promoting evil, does not make him any more deserving of hell than you or I. And just like God loves me, he loves Osama bin Laden. And God isn't rejoicing that Osama is in hell. He would rather he had turned from evil and LIVE. Indeed, that sinners go to hell is truth, but it is also tragic.

You see, when a believer dies, we can say like Paul "to die is gain." But the death of an evil person is not gain, it is only a warning of what would be our fate, the fate of every person that ever lived, good or bad, if it weren't for the grace of God.

But those of us who are living, we have been called to a single purpose - to live for the glory of God. And one day, to die in such a way that will be gain.

However, on the flip side, I do believe that in a way, the death of someone like bin Laden is also a victory. God promises victories over His enemies. And it is only through punishment and death that there is victory. It is glorifying to God when there is victory over evil. And ultimately it is a picture of the judgement day to come. That day when we will all be judged. And our Creator will either see Christ in us or will not. If Christ is not in us, our eternal fate and judgement will be the same as this man who left Americans cheering in the street at his death.

6 Weeks Makes a Life Changing Difference

I hadn't posted anything lately about Elijah and thought an update was long overdue. Apparently I am as guilty as most about being quick to let people know when things are going well and ask for prayer, but I've been slow to give praise for the immense good that has happened. Elijah has had a complete turn around and now has been able to use the toilet normally for six weeks -- without surgery! The prognosis is great - although there is a small section of his bowel that does not function, however with minor daily laxatives, he is able to keep things moving. He still has painful bladder spasms 3-5x each week, and has a few other minor hiccups. But overall, we are thankful to report, that he is a healthy, happy, normal, almost-five-year-old! So thank you for praying with us through this and thank you for asking (many of you did) how he was. Now join us in praise for the incredible turn around that we were told wasn't possible!

No Surgery, for now...

For now, surgery has been delayed indefinitely. We met with the surgeon today, who has decided that he wants to have more information about the root cause of Elijah's bowel issues before moving forward. Basically, not enough tests have been done. Also, Elijah's bowels are still completely full. I didn't fully understand how, after changing many, many diapers every day that this could be even remotely possible, but the scans don't lie. Apparently, there is blockage and the miralax is just pushing stuff around the blockage. Our orders for the weekend are twice a day ADULT sized enemas and twice a day ADULT dose of miralax.

So, on Monday, they will repeat the scan, if he is still full, then they will admit him for a bowel cleanout. Yeah, that doesn't sound fun. Then they will do an enema contrast to see the shape of his bowels. Finally, they will do a bowel biopsy to determine which part of the nerves are dead - and which are not. If there is enough functioning bowel, they may be able to do a "pull-through" procedure that will allow him to function fairly normally, but with a section of the bowel removed and the good stuff all connected together. This is only a possibility.

Another possibility is that by cleaning his system out - allowing him a clean start, it would allow his body to "learn" how to control his bowels. They aren't holding out a lot of hope for this, but think we should try.

Finally, we could still end up with a colostomy. Again, not what we want, but one way or another, we think that we have a good team of doctors that is committed to quickly running more tests and assuring us that it is the right move, right now.

I feel exhausted from the quick change of plans, but happy to have more answers before moving forward. I hate giving the enimas - it is torture for Elijah and the first one didn't produce a lot of results.

Pray that we'll get through the weekend first and have more answers on Monday. We go in for a scan first thing and then see the doctor again at 11.

Decision Made

We will not be taking Elijah to Cincinnati. After further discussion with the intake nurses there, it appeared as if their treatment is not what we feel would be best for Elijah. It was very clear after reading more on their website and the conversation this morning with the nurse, what our decision would be. We are very thankful for this clarity. The treatment they were recommending would include a daily routine that would really restrict Elijah *every*single*day*for*the*rest*of*his*life! They doubted how much success we would have based on his age and said that he would likely end up with a colostomy anyway. Furthermore, many children who have success with the program, feel so tied down by it, that they opt for a colostomy in their teenage years.

So it obviously isn't the breakthrough we thought it might be. However, some good news did come in today. The gastroenterologist, who had previously only reviewed Elijah's chart, but didn't have any openings to see him, has had a cancellation for tomorrow and Elijah got the appointment. I will feel much better having spoken to him in person and having the opportunity to ask a lot of questions. Also, Elijah is at Roxanne's today and at noon she said he had gone potty on the toilet, twice in the morning. This has never happened at home, so it gives me hope that he might have some urinary control, but loses it only as his bowels back up. Or maybe enough control to go on a timed voiding schedule?? What this means is that with a colostomy, he may not need catheters in any form?! Only time will tell, (and honestly, we'll know next week) but wouldn't that be wonderful? So tonight, we will rest much better, knowing that the Lord is guiding us on this journey. Day by Day!

Making Big Decisions Fast

So last week, the urologist, gastroenterologist and pediatrician all agreed to move forward with colostomy and placement of a supra pubic catheter. We've been giving Elijah a Miralax treatment to try and clean him out. Although its been working to the tune of many diapers a day, it hasn't been working to the end of cleaning him out. The x-ray today still showed a good amount of stool left. They also removed the catheter for a few days, because his urethra was irritated so they wanted to give it a rest.

Yesterday, the surgeon worked with Elijah's doctor and moved his schedule around to make an opening to see Elijah next Friday, the 11th, for a consult and if there was time, he might do the surgery then... (BIG IF, since the doctor is on call that day.)

Then, today, we saw the urologist again, and he had gotten information and is recommending that we stop moving forward with the colostomy and instead take him to Cincinnati Children's Hospital Colorectal Center which has treated a patient very similar to Elijah with success. This of course would be a big step and a big deal for Elijah, for our family life during his treatment, which could take a long time.

So now, we just don't know what to do... Pray for wisdom for us, and the doctors. Pray for Elijah to be comfortable and to empty his bowels.

Not Sleeping

It's been a busy day and I can't sleep. Scott's mom had come to surprise us for a visit a few weeks ago on Micah's 6th birthday, stayed through Gideon's first birthday and just traveled home today. It was good to see her and we really appreciated all the help she gave us around the house and with the kids, but are ready to get back to our own routines too.

However, last night I woke up several times thinking of a new question for the doctors. I just can't help but feel for E and what he will go through over the next few months - even if ultimately it's for his own good - it's hard to reason that with a four year old. Now tonight I'm laying awake again thinking of the same things.

Pray for all of us. It's sure to be a stressful time. And pray for Elijah that he will stop hurting. We've started the bowel cleanout regimen and it's working, but he is still in pain - albeit less often. He tends to revert to babytalk and behavior when he is hurting, and we have to draw a hard line to not allow this.

A plan...

Today, Elijah saw Dr. O. For now the catheter stays put. Next week on Wednesday, we'll run a few tests and xrays and then schedule for a super-pubic catheter to be placed. We are also meeting with the gastroenterologist to talk about a colostomy. Not fun. Not fun. Not fun.